In my work with individuals with eating disorders I commonly find that fear keeps them trapped in their illness. Often I find it is not that they want their eating disorder, as much as it is that they are fearful of the unknowns of life without it. Common “what ifs” that trap these beautiful souls in the confines of their eating disorders include “what if my life isn’t better without it, what if I try and I fail, what if there isn’t anything else to define me when I am in recovery, what if, what if, what if.” Sound familiar?
To me Not One More means not one more person falling for the lie that they are better off with their eating disorder than without it, not one more person abandoning their true self for the false safety of their eating disorder, not one more person giving up their true purpose by settling for life in an eating disorder.
In order to break free of the “what if” trap you must remember to have HOPE.
H – Help from others
Eating disorders thrive in isolation. It can take a huge dose of vulnerability to say “I can’t do this on my own, I need help” but that is just the right first step to move from fear to freedom.
O – Optimism
Notice how all of the “what if” statements in the intro lead to doubt and dread? There is a lot of power in the messages we tell ourselves, so I propose a different kind of “what if” statement. “What if life is better than I could have ever imagined?”
P – Patience
Recovery takes time, practice, and commitment. The reality is things may feel worse at the beginning stages of recovery because you are getting more in touch with uncomfortable feelings. If you give up during this part of recovery you will never get to see the gifts that recovery has to offer. Be patient with yourself, your body, and the process as you start the healing journey.
E – Eat
Call a dietitian and reach out to a friend or family member to join you for a meal today. Eating disorders aren’t really about the food, but recovery can’t happen without it. Don’t keep putting off this part; make the commitment to nourish your body today!
Morgan Anderson, LPC, is an inpatient therapist for the Laureate Eating Disorders Program. Ms. Anderson has a passion for empowering individuals and their families in the process of finding healing, strength and purpose in their unique experiences. She pulls from internal family systems, dialectical behavior therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy in her practice. She is also trained in EMDR therapy, which she utilizes to help clients process and find relief from past traumas. Morgan received her Bachelor of Science degree in psychology from Oklahoma Christian University and her Master of Science degree in community counseling from Oklahoma State University.
Laureate Eating Disorders Program is a small, not for profit Eating Disorders Program in Tulsa Oklahoma. Laureate is a relationship based program, and takes important steps to preserve that culture, including: 1:3 therapist to patient caseload; therapists engage patients for 6-8 hours per day in individual and family therapy and groups; therapists and Dieticians share meals with patients in the dining room; and patients keep the same therapist, dietician and psychiatrist throughout treatment. As a non-for-profit program, Laureate continuously reinvests in staff and facilities. For more information, please visit www.saintfrancis.com/laureate/eating-disorders-program/